Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Why? Woman need to love THEMSELVES!

***** WARNING this post has sensitive subject matter *******

Recently in my life a good friend of mine told me that she had been sexually harassed at her job. The worse part of it is that it went on for FIVE years. When it originally started she reported it to her supervisor and it was NOT addressed. He was "warned" and nothing else happened. He started dating the supervisor (or was rumored to) and then my friend felt she could not report it any more. She endured extremely lewd comments and actions for FIVE years because she did not think it would do anything and she was afraid for HER job. Recently this man went on vacation and SEVERAL woman stepped forward with reports of sexual harassment and he was fired. Even after all this, my friend was afraid he would be allowed to return to work!! Her job wrote her up for waiting so long to report it. I hope that it shows her how serious this situation is and that she was never as helpless as she felt.

A fourteen year old friend recently was raped. She claims it was consensual. It makes me sad and ANGRY that a fourteen year old would be approached by a nineteen year old in the first place. It breaks my heart that she thought she needed to have sex to feel loved. 

Two of my friends recently broke up with their respective boyfriends... each for the SECOND time. Both felt the need to return to the abuse they had left. I made one promise to write a letter of all he had done and all that she felt so I could smack her with IT when and if she ever tried to return. 

A person I follow on Twitter recently posted about being told all her life that she "is a nothing". This powerful, strong woman is amazing! but still... 
When you hear these things you start to BELIEVE them!!

I think what aggravates me the most is that we beat ourselves up as woman. I was raised at the tail end of the Super Mom generation. I went to school full time, worked full time, and was a Mom.... and got VERY sick as a result. My body realized that taking over 50 credits in school (I was doing my Doctorate and Masters at the same time), and working over 30 hours a week, did NOT add up to enough sleep time.  I pushed through ALL the warning signs my body gave until it gave out. 
The worst part is... no one pushed me BUT me. I was proving something to the world that did not need proving! We are our worst critics, beat ourselves up the most, and are the worst at believing in ourselves. 

We need to learn to Love OURSELVES!!! I know that this is easier said than done... (HELLO... I was the woman willing to chuck it all last year). I have spent the last year healing, loving myself, and putting myself first. 

My GreenMan and I always say its amazing that we met at all... He had to meet a special woman, get her to agree to be a test patient for him, travel hundreds of miles with her, get invited to the Pagan gathering, and then show up! 
I always tell him... I had to be willing to take the time for ME... to take the time to heal. Yes, that meant learning how to make drums, taking the time to travel, accepting the trip... but ultimately if I had not decided I needed the time to heal and focus on me I would NOT be here today... and this little girl would not be kicking the laptop! ;) I am BREAKING this cycle!!! I will NOT pass this on to my daughter!!!

I  am in such a good space right now... but I CREATED this space, and work on it everyday. I had help... we all need help... so when I began to think of what I could do for these woman I care so much about I created a Love Thyself spell. 
I thought I would share it all with you. Its simple and can be repeated as often as you like. I made up bags with all the ingredients and the printed spell and handed them out to some of my dear friends... I may not be able to make bags for all the woman that read this but at least I can give them the know how ;)

Please know that YOU are special, that YOU are Beautiful, that YOU are part of the Divine, that you are LOVED <3 

YOU are Beautiful, YOU are LOVED, YOU are a daughter of the Goddess, SHE lives inside of YOU. As You LOVE others LOVE YOU more.
What you need:

pink candle
rose petals
rose incense stick
a lighter
best carried out on a Friday (but do any day that you need love)
Rose Quartz

Focus and meditate on your intent
Make the pedals into a circle around the pink candle and light the candle
Light your rose incense stick
Really think off all the things you like about yourself and visualize these nice thoughts entering the candle and being pushed out in to the universe through the flame
Sit and focus on the universe returning this love thrice to you and healing every part of your body, mind and spirit. Repeat these words:

"I am part of the Universe,
I am wonderful outside and in.
I am special unto myself,
So let the love come in.
Negative thoughts, they vanish,
I now toss them out.

Negative feelings, be banished,
Let my love shine out."

Repeat 3-5 times.  Then say So Mote It Be.

Let the Candle extinguish itself if you can.

Carry your Rose Quartz with you knowing that it holds extra love for you from Me and the Lord and Lady
Now, do something special for yourself today
Treat yourself... you deserve it.

Please DO THIS!!! but also Please SHARE this... how nice it would be to share love with other woman and help break the cycle. <3

PLEASE remember ONLY you can let people affect how you feel... do NOT give them power over you!! YOU are a powerful, wonderful, special, beautiful part of the Universe... OWN it! <3
Be Blessed


  1. Thank you for posting and sharing this with us. We all need to know we are strong and trust in our own strength. Love blessings and joy.